Your head is a boil, you suck worms, I hate your feet!

This post is aimed at exactly ONE person in the universe and she knows who she is.

I’m, of course, MC Simon Milligan master of funk and evil.

Am I evil for finding this hilarious?  I mean, I laughed out loud.
Lost Cat, Dog On Journey Die Immediately

Liar! Liar! (4/25/09)

The answer to last week’s “Liar, Liar” was #5:  MyGuyTM’s brother is a rabbi and has graciously said he would perform the ceremony!  We couldn’t be happier. As for the others: I know I’m sort of a freak when it comes to MAMMA MIA but, please, I’m not that crazy; If you don’t know the answer [...]

I can show you my latest obsession.

I still enjoy Garfield minus Garfield.
And I check in on The Superest from time to time.
But my new internet pleasure is Alien Loves Predator, a weekly strip where an Alien (Abe) is roommates with a Predator (Preston) and wacky hijinks ensue.  Here’s some examples:

Stop it, storm!

You’ve seen the Gathering Storm ad.
You’ve seen the parodies.
Now see the best parody yet.

And there’s your lady shoulder.

I’m sorta loving BETTER OFF TED.
And it gets more freaking hilarious every week.
They could spin off any of the characters into their own show and I’d watch them all. Especially Linda. She makes me laugh until I hurt.
Which, of course, means that ABC will be canceling it aaaaaaany minute now.
Here at ASSUME CRASH POSITIONS, we [...]

And I feed on the fear that’s behind your eyes.

In addition to all the terrific reviews for NEXT TO NORMAL, there’s this great story in the NEW YORK TIMES.
Why, yes. I am just a little bit excited about this show. How kind of you to notice.

‘Cause what doesn’t kill me, doesn’t kill me.

“What happens if the cut, the burn, the break, was never in my brain or in my blood but in my soul?”
–”The Break,” NEXT TO NORMAL
 
 
I don’t know that I can review NEXT TO NORMAL without spoiling a few of the twists and turns involved (and every review I’ve seen where they dance around the twists and [...]

Liar! Liar! (4/18/09)

OK, let’s try this again.
One of these impending wedding-related items is true. Can you pick it out in a line-up?
 1. We’ve decided to have a MAMMA MIA themed wedding where the attendants will be dressed in wetsuits (the boys) and bikinis (the girls) and the processional will be “Does Your Mother Know?”.
2. The night before [...]

NYC, what is it about you?

Back from NYC!
 
First, a little housekeeping: many of you noticed that last Saturday’s Liar Liar is seriously screwed up. I don’t know what happened. It’s an odd amalgam of the new version and the previous version.  I’ll post the real new version this Saturday.  Sorry for the confusion. Not quite sure how that happened.
 
To the [...]